I finished this book in February 2025. I recommend this book 2/10.
Why you should read this book:
This book provides 15 toolsets for leaders. The book is written by the collaboration of three business coaches, and feels like a five-day seminar and slide deck converted into a book.
Get your copy here.
🚀 The book in three sentences
You need to master many different toolsets to be a great leader.
You need to ask questions and challenge the status quo.
Slow down, ask yourself if you are above or below the line, and work the toolsets to find the solution.
📝 My notes and thoughts
P45. Taking Radical Responsibility: I commit to taking full responsibility for the circumstances of my life and for my physical. emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. I commit to supporting others to take full responsibility for their lives.
P61. Learning Through Curiosity: I commit to growing in self-awareness. I commit to regarding every interaction as an opportunity to learn. I commit to curiosity as a path to rapid learning.
P74. Here are a few examples of what might be wonder questions (remember that it's not so much the actual words of the question but the consciousness from which the question is asked):
I wonder what outrageous customer service would look like?
I wonder what I can learn today that will benefit everyone?
I wonder how we could get more done in less time?
I wonder what choices I could make today that would allow me to experience greater and greater fun and creativity?
I wonder what I could do today that would allow for a breakthrough in my life?
I wonder what I can learn from the issue that keeps coming up with my partner that would expand my leadership?
I wonder how abundance is showing up in my life today?
P79. Practicing the Commitment:
Commit to learning over being right. Decide that even though you will get defensive at times, you will make the choice to shift to curiosity whenever you recognize you're defensive and below the line. Also decide that you will consider everything in life as a learning opportunity and value learning above all else. Share this commitment with key people in your life and request their support.
Ask yourself regularly, "Am I above or below the line?"
If you are below the line, can you accept yourself for being just where you are?
If you're below the line, ask yourself, "Am I willing to shift?"
If you are willing to shift, choose a shift move to open yourself to learning.
Ask wonder questions. Keep a list and share them with people close to you.
P81. Feeling All Feelings: I commit to feeling my feelings all the way through to completion. They come, and I locate them in my body then move, breathe, and vocalize them so they release all the way through.
P107. Speaking Candidly: I commit to saying what is true for me. I commit to being a person to whom others can express themselves with candor.
P115. To own our projections, we notice that a judgment has arisen about being disrespectful. Once we notice this we ask the following kinds of wonder questions from curiosity:
How am I being disrespectful in my life?
How am I being disrespectful toward my boss?
How am I being disrespectful toward myself?
How is it as true or truer that my boss is being respectful to me?
How am I requiring people, including my boss, to be disrespectful toward me?
How do I create this, and how do I keep it going?
How am I not seeing the value of interrupting? I've made interrupting a bad thing and am I open to seeing how interrupting could be a good thing?
Am I willing to see how interrupting could actually be a sign of respect instead of a sign of disrespect?
P135. Eliminating Gossip: I commit to ending gossip, talking directly to people with whom I have a concern, and encouraging others to talk directly to people with whom they have an issue or concern.
P153. Practicing Integrity: I commit to the masterful practice of integrity, including acknowledging all authentic feelings, expressing the unarguable truth, keeping my agreements, and taking 100% responsibility.
P175. Generating Appreciation: I commit to living in appreciation, fully opening to both receiving and giving appreciation.
P189. Excelling in your Zone of Genius: I commit to expressing my full magnificence and to supporting and inspiring others to fully express their creativity and live in their zone of genius.
P205. Living a Life of Play and Rest: I commit to creating a life of play, improvisation, and laughter. I commit to seeing all of life unfold easefully and effortlessly. I commit to maximizing my energy by honoring rest, renewal, and rhythm.
P221. Practicing the Commitment: When you feel the need to get serious or work much harder, consider doing the following:
Take a couple of minutes to argue for why you can't have what you really want.
Make up a country song title that describes your current issue and sing a line.
Have a fifteen-second temper tantrum. Be sure to include your whole body and make noise.
For thirty seconds, hop on one foot and, flap your current body posture and then talk about your issue for one minute.
Sing "I am right—you are wrong" to the tune of your favorite nursery rhyme.
P225. Exploring the Opposite: I commit to seeing that the opposite of my story is as true as or truer than my original story. I recognize that I interpret the world around me and give my stories meaning.
P228. I discovered that when I believed my thoughts, I suffered, but that when I didn't believe them, I didn't suffer, and that this is true for every human being. Freedom is as simple as that. I found that suffering is optional. I found a joy within me that has never disappeared, not for a single moment. That joy is in everyone, Always.
P229. The purpose is to help us find our own truth:
Is it true?
Can you absolutely know that it's true?
How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without the thought?
P237. Sourcing Approval, Control, and Security: I commit to being the source of my approval, control, and security.
P245. One of our favorite quotes from Hale is, "You cannot go anywhere to get what you already have, and you cannot do anything to become what you already are." This is a game changer! What if you already have security, control, and approval? What if what you are is already totally secure and safe, and its survival is already guaranteed? What if you already are totally approved of, loved, accepted, wanted, and valued just as you are? What if everything that is worth being controlled is already completely under your control? If all of the above is true then the vast majority of human effort is a waste of time. Most leaders spend most of their time living in fear that they lack approval, control, and security. They then act from this fear to try to get it. What if you already have it now? Wow.
P253. Having Enough of Everything: I commit to experiencing that I have enough of everything...including time, money, love, energy, space, resources, etc.
P267. Experiencing the World as an Ally: I commit to seeing all people and circumstances as allies that are perfectly suited to help me learn the most important things for my growth.
P271. In the experience of growth, pressure plays a critical role. reactive leaders often revert to seeing obstacles when they encounter a challenge. Alternatively, conscious leaders welcome this experience because they see the benefit of pressure; it either causes them to wake up and take action or allows new things to come forth. Before something changes, it usually breaks down first. For example, athletes know that the workouts that make them faster are the ones that break down their muscles—literally tearing the muscle fibers—so they grow back stronger. Supportive pressure is a catalyst for learning, change, and growth. It challenges the leaders to fulfill their potential and live in their full magnificence.
P274. Ask yourself this question: "Would I be willing to see this person and these circumstances as an ally for my learning?" Your willingness is essential for any shifts to occur. If yes...:
What is it that I could not have experienced without this person/circumstance?
What part of this am I most resistant to? Can I see that this is true about me? And am I willing to welcome/love that part in myself?
What is my biggest judgment about the way it is? Am I willing to see that the opposite of my judgment is true or truer?
How is this person or circumstance helping me face something that I have been unwilling to acknowledge or face?
What quality could not have been developed in me without this person/circumstance?
How is the universe using this person or situation to give me feedback?
How is this in service to my growth?
What part of me is this bringing forward to welcome, honor, accept, or love?
In twenty years (or two), what will I say I learned from that?
In twenty years (or two), what about this will I be grateful for?
P279. Creating Win for all Solutions: I commit to creating win-for-all solutions (win for me, win for the other person, win for the organization, and win for the whole) for whatever issues, problems, concerns, or opportunities life gives me.
P291. Being the Resolution: I commit to being the resolution or solution that is needed: seeing what is missing in the world as an invitation to become that which is required.
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